John McCoy, letter, to Martha McCoy, 1864 January 17

no doubt you will reasonably be surprised to to receive this letter from me dated in the sunny south however fate has decreed that it should be so. I am both ashamed and afraid to write to you now after the elapse of so long a time but when I take into consideration the distances between us your just [illegible][guess (MKR): reprimand] the sound of which cannot reach my ears at present therefore be good enough to keep cool until I return home and I will tamely submit to all. believe in the course I have taken was duly taken and considera-tion before I enlisted. I suppose you have heard before now that entered the U.S. Service. but to come to the most essential part of the business. I enlisted in Danvers for the sum of $627 dollars Bounty 352 dollars to be paid down

before leaving the state of which sum I recieved 27 dollars on the 5th instant and on the eighth the further sum of 325-dollars said money I left with the paymaster to ^be^ forwarded to you and also your address, the 325 dollars was to ^be^ sent to Chateaugay to the Town clerk or Treasurer and to be there on or about the 12th of this month subject to your order. it may be that you have received the money before now if not on the receipt of this attend to it with-out delay as I feel very uneasy concerning it on account of the way in which I left you, when you get it pay John, the Boss and Nancy and no more to any other person until you hear again from me. buy for yourself and the children what will make you all comfortable but at the same time use frugality although I consider the above caution needless I could send you some money

enclosed in this only that this is the first day in Fort Totten and military dicipline is very strict here I cannot ascertain as yet what will be needed to make a full Kit however on receiving an answer to this I will risk enclosing a little money to buy a present for my little Pip that I dream so much about — I feel very uneasy about you all as on the nights of 14 and 15th Thursday and Friday I dreamed several times each night when stopping in Norfolk harbor in the state of Virginia my sleeping imagination carrying me back to my old home amongst my little children a spectator of their mirth and jolity that sounded to me far more harmonious than any music I ever heard either vocd or instrumental I was carrying Pip in my arms happy beyond all description when Alas the spell broke I was awake Ah disapointment thou art ever an

unwelcome messenger. I became conscious of where I was when I heard the heavy step of the sentinel who comes there, the countersign &c, all was told the rest of the night I passed in pacing the deck of the steamer to and fro I am happy to inform you that my health never was better I have plenty of food victuals and I assure you I do the cook House ample justice this letter only commences the fun the next will require two or three ^sheets^ in order to give you a few of the lines on my m^in^ute Book incidents of travel climate the service my experiences &c lend me a kiss for my three little pets and I will amply repay you when I get home Albert Archy & Johnny be good to mamy and I will send you money to buy cloths-